Let's talk about comparing ourselves to others- I spent last night doing it. Which is dumb because I know better. We all know better. We tend to look at others and think their life is shinier, more put together and probably the BEST life ever. The thing is we all KNOW the truth. We know everyone's life is messy. We know that everyone has their hard. We know everyone is NOT put together all of the time but we still buy into the perfect moments we see and how short our lives and we are in comparison.
I did this last night to myself and I paid a hefty price on how I viewed myself and this shop. When I started The Tailored Market I stopped following all the boutiques I bought clothes from because I wanted my purchases to be genuine. I didn't want to buy something just because I saw it selling like hot cakes on someone else's site. I didn't want to compare my pictures with their pictures and their style with my style. However last night a sponsored ad showed up on my Instagram from my all time favorite boutique and I caved. I spent the next hour slowly watching my inner critic come out in full flipping force. I finally shut off my phone and had made the decision this shop was a terrible idea and I was dunzo. My style sucks because the things I really love most times no one comments on or there are very few. My pictures are the worst things ever. Let's be real they are FAR from professional. It has nothing to do with not wanting them to be, and everything to do with money. I have big plans mapped out for the future but in the mean time I am working my tail off trying to get to where I want so those plans can happen, but THIS- what I am offering now sucks and I am done. As of last night I was saying screw the plans and dig a hole as fast as you can and hide in it because the clothing world would be so much better off without me in it and I should never show my face again. I could have left it there last night and I could have woke up this morning and deleted this whole page but I didn't.
Instead I reached out to a couple friends and I went to bed feeling better. This morning I woke up early to work on getting a few more orders shipped and this little tag was the first one I picked up to put on a package and it was the "perfect" moment. The one where you are reminded maybe just maybe someone somewhere is trying to remind you this place is for you- and it was just the answer I needed.
I am always going to find someone else to compare myself to in this world. I am always going to see those "perfect" moments in other people's lives. There are going to be other boutiques who are bigger and more perfect in my eyes than mine, but those things don't have to take away from me- or you.
I can offer you clothes here- but so can any other boutique. I can offer you good customer service- but so can someone else. I can offer you all the sizes- but so can another store. The only thing I can offer you that is different in this boutique equation is ME. I can offer you me and at the end of the day I have to lay my head on my pillow and know that it was enough.
I am not telling you this to feel sorry for me. I am telling you this because it applies to ALL of us. There are a lot of people who measure up to the equation but the one factor that changes the whole outcome is YOU. You change the equation because no one out there can offer and be exactly who you are. As hard as that can be to remember at times it is the simple truth. Trying to be someone else is a waste of the person you are and wasting something as awesome as you is a horrible, horrible idea.
We were all meant to SHINE- and yes, that includes you. The one reading this!
And now I will go to my shipping hole and hide until I have all my packages shipped. Happy Saturday my friends!